Saturday, February 28, 2009

if you only had been lyrical, but you're logical

danielle took this picture of my new hair cut for me. it looks longer in this picture than it actually is. anyway i've just accepted it. it'll grow back and it's much easier to dry now.
today was wonderful once i remembered that we don't have class tomorrow for 2/28 memorial day. friday usually takes on some of the doom of saturday, but today was great. i gave a test in my first class. 1 kid made 100, 2 kids were in the 60s. they couldn't read, couldn't recite, couldn't ask me a QA. class #2 was awesome as usual.

mosquito down!! yesterday i thought i smushed one, but when i went to pick him up off the wall, he just puffed back up and flew away. since then, i've learned my lesson with making sure they're fully dead.

so i'm trying again to get into the power of now. it just seems kind of dated to me, and my mom taught me all of those lessons when i was little, so his narration about 'if you think that sounds impossible..' or 'if you're a really unhappy person..' or 'if you don't believe me yet..' is a little annoying. but it made me realize something important. i read somewhere a long time ago that if you make a list of what you're looking for in a partner, you'll subconsciously find it.
my list used to be.. loves me unconditionally, has a good relationship with their family, doesn't engage in any illegal recreational activities, has a generally positive outlook on life.
new hair picture #2.
that list was alright, but i think my new list is 1 item: is totally happy with themselves, as they are, right now.
that way, they won't be looking for me to 'complete' any part of them, and they'll be happy so they won't have a need to pick on me or themselves or others, and you know, the list goes on and on.
i guess all i can do right now is try to make myself totally happy with myself as i am now and then i think i'll draw people like that toward me. i'm not sure if anyone ever gets there 100%, but i think i can honestly say i'm genuinely pretty happy with myself and the world around me.

lesley is making granola and it smells so good. i think i'm going to sneak some out of the oven.

1 comment:

Majjy said...

Your hair is adorable. You look younger, which may not seem like a big deal now, but someday you'll appreciate how shaving a few inches of hair subtracts years. My Mary Martin cut, chopped on Wednesday,has had that effect.

I'm glad you've learned the lessons in The Power of Now through osmosis over a lifetime. You'd be surprised how many people reading it for the first time find it to be life altering information. Sad but true.

No one ever truly changes because of anyone else's prodding. Many folks spend a lifetime attempting to "improve" their mate, mostly unsucessfully. Life is short. I applaud your desire to search for someone fully functioning. You're on the right track looking for another happy person. Like attracts like- so no problem.